A-Parent-ly #32

As this is an ongoing experience, I will break them up into different postings over time. Hence, the random numbering on the title.

First off, no. I am not a parent in any way. But I can say, being one is not easy. Never knew how difficult and frustrating it is for my parents to bring us monkeys up until recently. Karma came early, I guess. Too early. Will tell more some other time.

Mother used to babysits. Newborns to toddlers. One at a time. Being her own "elder children", we helped out when she's busy with the housework.
But it wasn't these cute little babies my first attempt to "babysitting". It was Bro.

There's this
one particular time that is deeply carved in my memory.

It was just like any other help-your-mother-look-after-your-brother day. I was on the sofa, flipping an Old Master Q in hand. Laughing my chest off the whole time. Bro, only few months old, in his walking chair. Being a baby.

He started crying. It's getting worst by the second. I gave him the soft stopping cries "oooiii" (not the yelling one), while moving him. My eyes still on the brown pages of Old Master Q. I then smelled
something... foul.

very familiar.

I quickly ran to Father's room. Climbed on his queen size bed standing. Faced my back on the huge mirror. Pulled my mini pants down. Bent over. Looked between my legs. Spread the cheeks a little. And checked me out if I've pooped myself. Thought I might be having a slight diarrhea.

Eh? Mana ada!? I went back out and got a shock.

pooped all over his walking chair. So much, it got onto the floor!
"It was all yellow..." (Coldplay)


I could never imagine what a five-year-old me can think of at that time. The response was so spontaneously done.
Not a second wasted. From the moment of the stench digging deep in the nostrils, to the eyes squinting at the ass. While doing it with blood rushing to the head.

Why those steps? I wouldn't know. But. Simply. Flawless.

All I can say is the feeling of a 5mm thick rotan landed on your skin was really unpleasant.

"That's for you for unable to do a simple thing!"


  1. *ROTFL* ok..ok.. I should not laugh too much. Gives you the wrinkles :P

    Ahh... Old Master Q. Whenever my gran returns from Chinatown, my brother and I used to clamour for those Master Q comics. Real contraband in our household 'coz my Mother regarded these as being totally stupid and a complete waste of time *tsk tsk*

    And sometimes, just for the heck of it (and also to irritate the shit out my youngest sister), my brother would imitate Master Q and I would have to play the part of his sidekick, Mr Big Potato.

    Of course, my brother will get carried away with his king-fu moves and breaks something. Then, it will be game over. Both get rotan! hahaha.

  2. HAhAhA... Dai Fan Shue! I like that shorty. Who's playing Mr. Chin then?