Room to rent

My parents used to rent out a room.

It was the back room, the second largest after the master.

hey rented it to a male college student. His girl came to "lived" in later on. I lepak a lot with them. Was the only child then. Need companions and friends to play with. Remember once I was playing in their room, they constantly pestered me to go out. Saying they need to study. It took me a while to give in. I'm a stubborn child. But come to think of it now, it must be a subject on Kamasutra.

The pair rented the room for a year or so.
Never heard from them ever since. I always wonder what happened to them. Couldn't really remember their faces, but the only thing I can recall is the guy wear glasses, fair complexion, and the girl has a wavy, shoulder length hair.

By now, they should be in their 50s.

Water heater is a luxury then. And the house only has one, which is in the bath of the master. The girlfriend has a "habit" of showering without closing the door. This is true. I bet she's expecting the boy to grope her, or have a quickie when he comes back. From the outside, the bathroom is secluded. Guests won't know if we didn't tell.

It was rather

Can you read floor plan?
The red cross is where the bath is.

One day when she's taking her shower, I went in to have a peek. I know what you are thinking. I'm still a child. Just curious. Okay? It wasn't long. She was facing the wall opposite the sink. Enjoying the hot stream. She's wet and a little soapy. I scanned her from head to toe. She then turned. And saw me.
This is very new to me.

Another quick head to toe before I ran out.

"Mummy, mummy! Why
jeje down there got grass?"

"What grass?"
Mother was confused. Father's listening, even more confused.

"Black grass!"

She came out blushing. And got a lecture from my parents for not locking the door for the x number of times. I was sitting on the sofa watching TV. Being a child.

They seldom lock their room door too. One night, I popped my head in at the door
. It wasn't that late. There were still Chinese dramas showing on TV. But the lights were already off. Their silhouettes were visible through the faint light bouncing off their bodies.

A little worried, I ran out.

mummy! Koko and jeje fighting! Jeje going up and down on him!"

Another lecture. Bad thing for them. Good thing for me. At least I'm exposed young. I was slightly over three then.

This is my room now.


Stripeless tiger

Someone posted this vid on Facebook.

The woman in the Lexus was trying to reverse park. From the video, she took the whole two minutes to get her car in. Tried linking the video here, but you need to log on to view it. I try to Google it elsewhere. Found!.

Snapshot from Facebook. The guy at the top is not the one who shot this.
Look at the last comment.

Some logic first.

Don't quote me on this. It might have taken
anyone a minute (?) before he or she would actually bring a camera out to shoot this. One plus two, from the actual video shot, that's three minutes. So, let's just put it that the woman took three minutes* to park her car.

Here's the thing.

It's not that I fancy this video so much I have to share it. But seriously. I'm. Very. Disappointed. Not at the woman. I'm not worried about her. Of him spending the whole *three minutes bitching about how bad the woman's driving skill is, he could have got down, use his own skills, to help five (?) similar auntie's. At least.

Besides the men, the 5th, 7th, 8th, and the 9th row are all women. Not only they did not say anything good to side the auntie, but joined the fun.
Tsk, tsk, tsk. At least one of them mentioned something about lending a hand. Are all the women that said something there any better? Men are as bad a driver lah.

Tiger, you can only do so much?

No, no, no. I think I'll take out the question mark.

Sounds much better.
If not the best.



I've been reading these stuffs recently. Which reminded me of my own experience dealing with such customers. Some made my day. A small portion almost make me stomp on their pathetic face.

This was long before I'm an advertising slave.

After having a one-year stint at Old School Art College, I was working odd jobs here and there. My first was doing part time with Factory's Apparel Shop at French Hypermarket near my place.

There was once on a slow day, a pair of cute couple in their 60s came in. Kinda short. And plump. There's always smile on their face. Which makes us smile even more. From their look and the way they speak, I can tell they are well educated and came from a well-to-do background.

"Hello! What can I do for both of you? Do you have anything in mind?"

"Just looking around." The uncle smiled, in Cantonese.

"If you need anything, I'll just be around." From then on, I speak Cantonese
to them.

I continue to fold shirts, sort sizes, and reorganizing shirts that don't belong where I found them, before I lepak at the register with the store supervisor. Just then, I saw them looking at some winter jackets for quite some time; the most expensive pieces in the store.

Seldom people even touch them because of the price.

This is how our paycheck work. Besides the basic, there is also the commissions. Every staffs will get a small percentage from each piece sold no matter who sell it. But this only applies to full time staffs. Too bad I'm only doing part time. Salary counted by the hours. But selling that is something I'm gonna be proud of.

I quickly rushed to them.

"Uncle, why not you give it a try?"

I took a red down. And gave it to him. He eagerly slide his arms in the sleeves. The wifey at back adjusting the hood, while he zipping the front. It does suits his plump figure. Even cuter now.

Checking himself out at the mirror

"It looks nice on you, uncle."

"Hmm..." He then looked up at other colours.

"The green one not bad also eh?"

I look at it. Speechless.

"Erm... it's... blue?"

The aunty smiling at me cheekily. Poking fun at her own husband.
He's wearing an orange tint spectacles. Which made the blue look yellowish green. He blushed, and didn't smile again for the rest of the time they were there.

Let's just say they didn't buy anything.


Lightning never strikes twice

Who made this statement?

These happened some time back.

Not much of food choices around the Plaza. Most come in small portion, but big bill. So, Buddy and me made it at the mamak next block. Besides the goreng stuffs and rotis, the next best thing is the nasi campur. We grabbed our food and sat outside.

While we were halfway through our meal, I bit on something hard. I spat it out
immediately. It bounced on the table towards Buddy. We looked at it. Stunned for while wondering. And had a good laugh.

I don't remember seeing an aquarium in here.

It was a white pebble. Slightly larger than jelly beans,
hidden inside the non-kuah rice. Lucky the bite wasn't hard. I never finish the rice. Got a discount for that after "Aneh! Saya mana ada ambil ikan!" argument with the mamak who wrote us the bill.

Until today, I couldn't figure out
where that came from?

Next day, we went back to the same place. Nah, a pebble won't kill, I thought.

We took the same thing. And sat at the same place outside. Wasn't so lucky like yesterday. I only had few munches this time. That's when I saw an unusual garnishing on the plate. I looked closer. And spat out whatever that I am halfway munching.

"FUCK!" Couldn't be bother if people were looking.

Gestured the Aneh to come over. Without saying a word, we looked at him while pointing at it with my "Apa macam?" pissed look. He apologized a few times and took the rice away. And asked nicely to order another food. So I did; Indomee kosong double with telur mata on top.

I checked carefully this time. But I still couldn't finish it thinking about the roach leg earlier. There goes my appetite. I skipped dinner on that day too. And I wondered who ate the rest of the body.

Two days I couldn't finish my lunch. Two. Fucking. Days. In a row.

What could be worst?


That's an extra 2 horsepower

For the truck.

Saw these while I'm on my way back the other day.

What is the dewan bandaraya doing with them? Is there really a need to rear horses? Ride them to write saman ar? To illegally parked golf carts? Or sweep the street à la polo style
? At least there is something different to see while being stuck in the same traffic, on the same road.

Tried searching their portal rasmi about the horses, for any upcoming annual events that involve the horses, or any equestrian competition of some sort.

"Server not found"
Just as I expected.

Tried again before posting this. Wow! That. Is. Slow. Fuck it.